Monaghanned

See Pearced, albeit more oral

Pearced

To be so drunk that you wet yourself and try it on with canines.

See also; Monaghanned

Top 4

1. Positions one to four, inclusive, on the league ladder.

2. Whoever offers most money.

NB. It's very easy to confuse these two definitions.

Satire

Satire in Rugby League, b Aug 29 1895, d 18 Oct 2012.
Satire in Rugby League died peacefully in it's sleep on the morning of Thursday October 18 2012, when total, utter failure of a coach Rob Powell, erstwhile of the London Broncos and off the back of a terrible season where he was replaced in order that the club didn't finish last, was appointed defence coach for Cardiff RU.
Satire in Rugby League is survived by Satire in rugby union which is thought to be in rude health.

SAAP

Acronym: Super-Annuated Antipodean Pensioner. The sort of player clogging up squads in the lower half of the Super League table.

Exile

1. Someone transported from their native land, normally for political reasons be they an annoyance to the current regime or paying for crimes when previously in charge.

2. Tax ~. To remove oneself from ones home country and claim residence in a low-tax regime in order to keep more of ones income.

3. Not someone who chooses freely to work abroad for a living.

Hair dye

1. Performance-debilitating drug.

2. Unnecessary distraction. "I'm afraid you've failed your driving test as the pretty lady crossing the road proved to be a right old hair dye and you ended up ploughing into the back of that school bus".

Harrigan, William

1. Litigious, arrogant ex-referee. Legend in his own opinion. World's first superstar referee, he says. Now makes his decisions from the safety of the video booth and continues to glory in the nickname 'Hollywood'

2. Descriptive term for a vain, narcissistic, arrogant individual. "I'm not surprised lots of people liked it when Naseem Hamed got beat up by Marco Antonio Barrera. He was too Harrigan by half".

Club Call

1. Super League innovation/gimmick (delete as applicable) whereby the highest ranked semi-finalist gets to pick their opponents from the previous week's qualifiers for the chance to go to the Grand Final and always results in the pickers picking the side they'd have ended up with anyway had the system not been introduced.

2. A complete and utter waste of time and energy. "I spent all day trying to nail some jelly to the wall. What a Club Call that was".

Vautin, Paul

Australian international back-row forward of the 1980s turned pundit and presenter of Channel 9's The Footy Show. Nicknamed 'Fatty' and 'the Fat Man', he's probably more known for taking 'that fucking catch' in an Allan Border testimonial cricket match than anything he did on the footy field:

Falcon

The act of being hit in the head with the ball whilst not looking as demonstrated by Matt Utai in this clip:



See also Fenech, Mario

Fenech, Mario

The Maltese Falcon. Once famously hit in the head with the ball during play whilst not looking, a move forever to be known as a Falcon.

Bears

Nickname forever to be associated with ignominious failure. See also North Sydney and Oldham.

York

Sporadically successful club (relatively speaking) who managed to alienate most of their core support by abandoning their central location in exchange for an athletics field in the middle of a retail complex.

X-rated

See also Boyd, Les

Keighley

Home of Cougarmania and the town where the mayor was forced to resign after nicking money out of player's wage packets in late 2011.

Jackson, Peter

Hugely talented but deeply troubled Australian stand-off/centre. Capped nine times by his country and known as a happy-go-lucky 'Clown Prince of League', he died way, way too young in 1997, aged just 33.

Inglis, Greg

Freakishly large Australian powerhouse. Tends to run through rather than round people.

Zisti, Nicolas

Australian winger who had an unhappy and not-very-fondly remembered spell with Bradford in Super League before fecking off to pick up a pension courtesy of the Italian rugby union.

Doncaster

Subject of ridicule in the 1970s with the longest losing streak ever seen at the time. Went to the Dogs, literally, went to the house of pain before settling for a nice council house next to a lake.